“It barely fit into my butt.”

The headline means I can’t get sued! The New York Post says:

John Travolta has an 8-year-old daughter, but it looks as if he’s the one obsessed with “The Little Mermaid.” The pudgy “Pulp Fiction” star sat front row with daughter Ella at the Lunt-Fontanne Theatre on 46th Street Saturday, where he sang along to the show’s tunes, including “Under the Sea.” Afterward, he brought 26 of Ella’s pals backstage and took pictures with the cast. “He was touching all the costumes, he looked amazed,” said our spy. “He said he was way, way into the show. He stayed backstage for a while.” (Source)

Show tunes. Sequined costumes. Lube. So it’s official: John Travolta’s as straight as Kirsten Dunst’s teeth. Anyone else willing to bet John spent the whole time backstage with Poseidon talking about his trident? I’d imagine he was about as interested in Ariel the Mermaid as Paris Hilton would be with a book. Also seen at the play: Travolta booing during the song “Kiss the Girl”.